People always ask me, “What country do you serve in?” My
response: “The Dominican Republic.” Many then proceed to nod their heads with a
big kool-aid smile saying, “Wooooowwww, you’re lucky!” Of course I think to
myself (and sometimes even out loud), “You have nooooo idea!” Peace Corps is
one of those things where some volunteers feel as though their struggle
validates their service. Not only that, outsiders assume that if you’re not in
the jungles of East Africa or the deserts of West Africa, you’re most likely
living in luxury. Contrary to popular belief, the struggle is real! However,
Peace Corps is about so much more than the limited conditions within the
confinements of four wooden walls or the few miles of dirt roads that I have
grown to call “Home.” It is about giving, learning, growing, teaching, and
receiving. It’s about getting bitten by mosquitoes and knowing not to scratch
it because open wounds need time to heal. Okay okay, you clearly missed that
metaphor, so I’ll give it to you in layman’s terms: It’s about confronting
hardship and sometimes wanting to give up, but then realizing that you can’t
because someone else’s hardship is contingent on whether or not you overcome
yours!
I have developed a love-hate relationship with Peace Corps
Dominican Republic, but up until a week ago, I did not understand why. I say it
time and time again, reflection and understanding are two key factors to growth
and service. Therefore, getting to the root of this internal conflict was my “May
Mission.”
I hate PCDR because it seems like every world problem found
its way to my small community. We feel the plague of poverty, the dangers of
domestic violence, the pains of pregnancy among adolescents, the agony of AIDS,
the horrors of hunger, the misery of malnutrition, the dismay of death, and
even the repulsions of rape. It is so hard because I signed up for Peace Corps
with this expectation of changing the world, but then I realize that one single
person does not possess the power to cultivate such a thing. I may never see “Quality”
Universal Education and even in their tireless efforts, the Red Cross may never
successfully provide world relief and the United Nations may never eradicate
violations of Human Rights. It seems as though change happens with people and
systems: you get to the core of who we are and what we want, then (de)construct
systems based on whether or not they agree, exploit, or contradict our values. So,
my hate for Peace Corps Dominican Republic is not based on a person, place, or
thing. It stems from the idea that no matter how hard I try, there are things
in this world that I may impact and influence, but never change.
Since I’ve already bored you with this long, seemingly
pointless discussion, I’ll BRIEFLY explain why I love PCDR: I am practically
fluent in another language; I’m one step closer to discovering my life’s
purpose; I have felt the true meaning of community; I’ve learned that having
nothing is not the same as lacking; I’ve matured to be content and joyful in
every state, I have grown to turn my selfish tendencies into selflessness; I
help young girls believe in themselves and their beauty, and most of all- I
have a flawless tan! I could keep going, but I won’t do that to you.
Basically, it’s a love hate thing!
